i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
