For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
