I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
