i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize