Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Randomize
