Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
