We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Randomize
