oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
im six kinds of drunk right now
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
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