dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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