Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
