its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Come share oat with me in your robe
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
