Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize