I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
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