would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
