do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
i black out too much to be "responsible"
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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