I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
