stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Randomize
