She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
