The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Randomize
