I understand Curling. That high.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
