this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize