My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Randomize
