no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
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