Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
