No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
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