this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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