it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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