Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
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