I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
