dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
