My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
