You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
My feet surprised me
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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