So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize
