Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Ladies don't puke and tell
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
