I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
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