love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
