I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
