In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize
