You just made me feel so damn special
I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Plan B is the new Plan A
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
