He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Randomize
