she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
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