I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
Randomize
