Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
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