we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
it hurts more in the daytime
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Randomize
