Your face is a jimmy john
I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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