omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
