i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
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