Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
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