I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
Randomize
