so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Randomize
